Just

between

us

By Shelby Horton

Dear Shelby,

My boyfriend really enjoys French-kissing, however, I do not enjoy the tongue action.

How do I tell him that I can’t stand this?

Or is there a way we can do his favorite way to make out without the tongue action?

Dear tongue twister,

If you really can’t stand the dancing of the tongues, just sit down with your partner and have an open conversation about what you dislike about this type of kissing.

He should respect your preferences, just like you should respect his. If one person isn’t enjoying themselves, there really isn’t a point in doing that specific action.

However if you want to try to find a way to compromise on his favorite kissing style, I recommend discussing the parts you really can’t stand and the ones you can tolerate.

French-kissing has many definitions from lip-biting, tongue touching lips, tongue to tongue, and sometimes getting ones tongue down the other’s throat.

Perhaps you enjoy the tongue to lips but can’t stand the intense tonsil hockey he wants to play inside your mouth.

Find little compromises like that, and maybe you both can enjoy a little French-kissing.

Dear Shelby,

When is the best time of day to have sex with your significant other?

Dear timed,

According to the hormone expert Alisa Vitti, it’s 3 p.m., since for heterosexual partners this is the time their hormones are balanced enough to satisfy both partners’ needs.

This goes against the traditional idea that early morning was the best time, since men’s testosterone levels would be highest, which stokes up sexual desire.

But Vitti argues that in the afternoon, the testosterone levels are lowered while estrogen rises. The combination of the two will make the man able to satisfy emotional and physical needs better since their libidos are more synchronized.

However, every body is different so everyone has different needs.

What may work for one couple may not work for another.

Dear Shelby,

Where are all the good men? It seems like I can never find a good guy.

Dear single,

Good men are everywhere, with some truly bad ones sprinkled about, here and there.

If you have a history of being attracted to guys that might have some bad traits, perhaps you should rethink your dating strategy.

Everyone has flaws and true love is loving someone despite their flaws.

But that doesn’t mean lower your standards.

You still deserve the best.

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