Fun in Hutchinson, politics, engage writer

By Hannah Wallace

Dear Hannah, What are some of the tools here on campus I can use to help me study better?

Dear student,

There are many studying tools that are available here on campus; for example, there is a math lab in the library that is open all day and is also free. If you need tutoring help in other subjects there are tutors available who will work with your schedule.

Dear Hannah, Why do guys flock outside of the student union to catcall girls?

Dear annoyed,

I think they congregate outside of the student union because their stunted IQ levels don’t allow them to realize that it’s 14 degrees outside and that standing inside would be the warmer, smarter choice.

For as much time as they spend standing around and catcalling girls, they won’t need the education that they are paying for because all they will have to do is to remember the phrase, “Do you want fries with that?”

Don’t let them get you down; just remember that you are better than them but not as good as Hannah Wallace.

Dear Hannah, What are your thoughts on the presidential debate?

Dear American,

I really don’t have faith in our legislators.

America is slowly going to hell in a hand basket and there is nothing that we can really do about it.

I just pray that Hillary does not become president; I don’t even trust her to lead a group of Girl Scouts. If Hillary becomes president, it will be the second biggest mistake America has ever made, right next to slavery.

Please go back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

Dear Hannah, What is there fun to do in Hutchinson?

Dear bored,

There are a lot of fun things to do in Hutch; I will name a few.

I like to go to Oliver’s Bar for Happy Hour. I also like to go to the movies and bowling. Those are pretty much all lies. I mostly stay in and watch Netflix and order pizza.

But if I had a social life I’m pretty sure that’s what I would be doing.

I am now taking applications for a best friend; the spot is vacant as of now.

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